Dirty Laundry

I have to tell you, I’ve never done this before… I’m just not that kind of girl.

 

But tonight, I’m pulling out the Dirty Laundry.

It is, after all, what got me to this place. 

31 years, a plethora of passions, 3 major loves and more neuroses than I can count.  I have reached the point of no return more times than I care to admit, and yet I always seem to end up on the same ledge.

After yet another dramatic crisis, it was once again time for me to get off my ass, out of my head, and out of my own way.  So I called the girls and through my tears, did what I so often do, blindly grabbed a bottle of wine.

This time, it ended up being the Dirty Laundry Chardonnay (2010) from the Okanagan Valley~ how appropriate.

Through the turmoil of my current catastrophe, I let it splash its way into me; A slightly tart, smooth and surprisingly fresh chardonnay, pale in colour, with what I imagine to be hints of pear, and a richness… but as my palette is still learning, it’s hard to know for sure. 

What I do know is that it did its job.  It calmed me, made me listen and gave me some perspective.    

What this wine offered me, with every new sip, was the chance to start over, to put aside all the craziness of what I know life to be, and be soothed by something outside of myself.  Swirling the wine as I recounted all my flaws provided a sharp contrast to the smooth, perfect pale core and golden rim.  The flavours of this wine surprised me. They weren’t what I might have expected in a chardonnay from the Okanagan, but they showed me that maybe I need to stop putting expectations on everything. What do I know anyways?

It’s been hard lately to trust my instincts, but just like my evolving palette, I’m learning to cultivate new ones. 

Like ourselves, wine can be a lot of things.  It can be a foray into passion, or it can be a quick release from pain.  It can be a sexy summer sipper on a hot patio, or the perfect partner for a romantic night by the fire.  An easy pinot grigio can calm your nerves after a long day at work while a bottle of bubbles will indefinitely dictate a debaucherous night out with the girls.

Like passion, to a lot of people, it’s the very essence of life, and for others, even while enjoyed, it's barely even considered.

That afternoon, like so many times before, I realized that something major needed to change.  And like each time before, sometimes it takes pulling out the dirty laundry to truly assess where you’re at in your life, where you want it to go, and what pieces you desperately need to sort out or get rid of. 

And sometimes…

All it takes is a long talk, a little perspective and a great glass of wine.